Every time Sunday rolls around, Instagram insists that it’s all about self-care. Over 660,000 #selfcaresundays are showing me that I should either put on a face mask or dip myself into a tub. It’s a monotone idea of self-care, so let’s paint a different picture, shall we? Imagine this: on the other side of the self-care table, a group of us are pausing emails for the weekend, limiting screen time, or heading off to therapy. And each of us can still have a face mask on. The vibe? The power of ‘no.’

An indulgent ‘no’ lands at the center of why I convinced myself to quit self-care Sunday. It’s an easy enough action to chill you out, while still helping to set personal boundaries. And while I think you should keep it simple, Sundays aren’t the only day you should be checking in with yourself.

While exaggerated consumerism depicts self-care as presentations of a “curated self,” know that the FOMO you’re feeling stems from the expectation that you should be curating your life in a certain way. Of course masking is fun! But it’s just one magnified proclivity. If we opened our minds, like cabinets, we would see so much more stuff in there—stuff besides skincare. We’re naturally full of weird, contradictory impulses, but what’s weirder is that we’re not talking about them more. 

So as I’m cultivating a new relationship with self-care, I also challenge you to ask yourself: How do you stay mentally balanced? And how are you taking care of yourself when social media’s presence feels so infinite and commodified?